01.11.2021 “Sweet Inside”
02.11.2021 Blank day
03.11.2021 Blank Day
04.11.2021 21:54 “Adari”
05.11.2021 Blank Day
06.11.2021 Blank Day
Entry 12: Class Notes 09.11.2021
This workshop was for developing our group project ideas and preparing ourselves for the next workshop. I decided to work on the idea I came up with earlier – making a dish we all would contribute for, and using the leftovers to create something from it. Miranda helped me with this idea by suggesting making compost – which is something I need to do more research on! Here is what I managed to write down so far:
I didn’t manage to finish it in time, but I will think about it more throughout the rest of the reading week as I make the presentation 🙂
Entry 13: Reflection – The Blank Days 09.11.2021
The days when I struggle to get out of bed. When I give in to the sweet, sweet procrastination, but of course, without escaping from the unavoidable guilt and waves of anxiety. And finally, the days when I refuse to wake up after a 15-hour long sleep. Well, turns out, that I finally decided to give them a name!
I call them Blank Days not because they’re not worthy of feelings (moods), nor because I do not feel anything (as I used to think). The truth is, each day is a journey full of different states of mind. However, two issues are on my way – a) sometimes I’m bad at naming or understanding them and b) I’m physically unable to perform many daily basis tasks, let alone anything creative. These days are prevalent right now, and I just realized, that they are not going to disappear. This fatigue won’t disappear. Depression won’t disappear. I’m trying my best, and sometimes I will fail. That is only natural.
So, instead, I decided to honour these days in a different way. I will write a page for every day, and when I feel like I’m approaching a Blank Day, I’ll show my mood otherwise – with short writing, and videos that resonate with the way I feel. As much as I would like to create something new every day, sometimes it’s better to just do the bare minimum instead of pure nothing. And I decided to not be ashamed of it anymore.
Perhaps I will find a way to keep being creative and this is the last Blank Day to come, or perhaps there will be more of them. Regardless of the future, at least now I can say that I am prepared.