week ten and eleven

I took the opportunity this week and last to deliver and refine my Project Proposal Form. I found my final presentation of my Proposal Form to be difficult, I found it hard to even talk about the concept of loss in a room full of people. I didn’t really think about the fact that I would have to stand up and tell people about my extremely personal project. I felt that if I would have kept my project more personal an if I would have shared less my project would progressed further. I jumped into the deep end for my first proper project and I wish I would of kept more parts to myself; I was quite emotionally burnt out by the end and think this reflected in my project as I ran out steam. I would say that I don’t regret doing my project, as it allowed me to realise my own emotional boundaries and let me explore my grief through the medium of performance and exploration in my practise.

Over this week I have also been reflecting on the progression of my project and my blog. Looking over my blog posts allowed me to realise what worked well and what didn’t throughout of my project. The biggest takeaway from my project is that I wish I would have thought about where my project would have ended up sooner. This would have helped me to process my final project and I think it would have ended up as a higher standard.

My favourite part of this Semester has been posting on this blog. I have loved the chance to explore my ideas over the nine weeks. If it was up to me I would keep exploring and experimenting on here for weeks and weeks. My favourite week for experimentation was week six. I felt this was the first time that I genuinely felt comfortable in public and this week seems to be surrounded by a warm glow in my head.

This Semester has also taught me that I am not island, as much as I would like to be. I noticed that my best work came from my own quiet and contemplative moments and best reflection came from discussion and interactions with others. It was because of this discovery that I found my process of hiding and emerging that helped me a lot with being in public.

If I were to take this module again, I would think about my final project sooner so that my final piece would feel less forced. I also feel that if I were to think about my final project and how my practise fitted in with my assignments sooner then I would enjoy my experimentation more and have more direction with my work.

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